One of these days, we’ll get around to posting an illustrated essay about our move from the tiny little hut on Onyx Cave Road to our spacious new digs at 2100 E Van Buren. But today is not that day.

Why?

Because we’re off on yet another store expansion. We’re tired of unloading trucks like this:

Yo ho, heave ho.

Because it makes Kendra do this in the parking lot:

Focker down! Focker down!

Plus! You know how, when you come in to shop at Focker’s, how the right third of the store is blocked off, full of boxes stacked to the ceiling? And all you can hear from the right third of the store is the sound of rustling, thumping and people cursing? Every now and again, you hear Jean’s faint cries for help when she gets trapped atop a triple-stacked pallet of Gatorade?

We need to fix all that. We’re piling up housewares and clothing and tools and all kinds of stuff. We need a place to put it. So we’re building a warehouse out back.

As Granny Fanny Focker likes to say, “You have to break a few $1.75/dozen farm-fresh, free-range eggs to make an omelet.” Yep, we’re wreckin’ the place.

Here’s where we started:

The darkside - back of the building.

As of yesterday, all the exterior shacks are down, courtesy of Morrell Construction, and The Dons [cue theme from "The Godfather"] had started delivering fill dirt:

Shack down! Shack down!

The Dons dragged in a mountain of fill and sculpted it with their gigantic Tonka Toys. Alas, we missed The Don photo op on that one because we were… what? Unloading a truck out front. (Sigh.)

But, as of this evening, Doc the Concrete Guy was on site, scheming and plotting:

L-R: Don Tonka, Leroy, Doc

In tomorrow’s episode of Construction Porn, we’ll seek to answer two serious questions:

• Will Kendra the Focklift Driver get to drive the backhoe in exchange for her promise of Crown Royal?
• Does Donny, The Don (not to be confused with Don, The Don) ever wear a shirt?